that's mrs. mediocrity to you

It is only when I understand how much there is to learn that I am able to learn anything at all. A statement that may or may not prove to be true.

But lately, it just seems that the world is filled with craziness. Crazy weather, crazy tragedy, crazy politics. Some days it just makes me want to crawl back into bed and hide my head under the covers.

Which, of course, I don’t do, I am too busy to stay in bed and besides, I would get claustrophobic. Some days, I don’t watch or listen to the news at all. And I have mixed feelings about this. It definitely makes it easier to feel happy if I don’t hear about all the sad or crazy things going on, but then I feel guilty, like I am hiding out, taking the easy way out.

Except when I do listen, I usually end up feeling helpless, and sometimes even hopeless, and I don’t like feeling that way, either.

It probably all comes down to balance, staying aware but not driving myself crazy. But some days I just want to scream at this country to get their priorities straight.

Should we allow a very rich, supercilious celebrity to question the legitimacy of our President? We do. Should we continue to ignore the changing global climate and hope that it will just go away, or fix itself? We do. Should we keep fighting change, in our medical system, our fiscal structure, our energy policy, because we fear it? We do.

I don’t claim to have the answers. But I am starting to understand this: we need to stop letting crazy rule. The extreme ends of the spectrum keep getting all the attention, and the voice of the middle, the average jo, keeps getting drowned out.

I want to stand up and be counted.

Before it’s too late.

birds but no bees

blooms but no leaves

silence but no golden

wind but no breeze.

::

day with no break

night with no rest

music with no refrain

heart with no ache.

::

smile but no grin

harm but no foul

simple but not easy

loss but no win.

::

life,

she says,

life.

::

::

::

this post is part of one shot poetry wednesday, for more, click here.

In spite of the weather, which has been nothing but cold and grey and rainy for weeks, Spring is forcing its way to the surface. A reminder that life goes on, even in the worst of circumstances.

Growth happens even when you can’t see it, or feel that it’s impossible. Fragility is often an illusion. There is strength to be found in this tiny flower that managed to poke its head through the wet, heavy ground. One small victory for one minuscule part of the food chain that is life.

There’s something to be said for tenacity, that never-give-up kind of stubbornness that keeps us moving through each day, clinging to the bits of sunshine and beauty that by chance may fall upon our shoulders.

It’s the ability to weather the storm that gets us there,

standing with our feet mired in a field full of mud,

and the sun on our face, blossoming.

::

silence

has a color

while

a rose has

a name.

::

it finally happened. i caught up with myself.

and before you get too excited and start congratulating me, let me explain that i am not caught up, it’s just that I am so far behind that i turned the corner and ran smack dab into myself.

running in circles never gets you anywhere, does it?

and believe me, it wasn’t pretty. i look a mess, all disheveled and distracted and harried. and i’m not even going to mention my hair.

i keep trying to force myself to slow down, but there just isn’t anyplace to do it. right now, my life is a scramble. some of it is self-imposed, but when it comes right down to it, most of it is not. so i keep scrambling and scurrying and squeaking by.

but, oh my.

now that i’ve gotten a good look at myself from behind, i can see that some things just have to change.

i need to, um, pare things down a bit.

i’m not yet sure where to start, where the give and take will happen.

but this rubberband is about to snap me back into place.

here’s hoping i land on my feet.

::

Today I am over at Vision & Verb

wearing my dunce cap.

But I am thinking about getting rid of it for good…

::

When you can’t see the forest for the trees, remember that you are the forest and the trees.

This came to me as a gentle reminder from a friend on Twitter, on a night when I was struggling with questions. Always, the questions.

But it was the perfect answer in that moment.

And then another friend joined in, and it was determined that I am suffering from a bad case of wiggly spirit. And while I had never heard it put in quite those terms, I knew immediately that it was the best diagnosis I have ever been given.

It was the perfect description of how I felt at that moment.

It was fairly late in the evening, too late to call a friend, everyone else in the house was sleeping, and in truth, I was feeling a bit sorry for myself. Several other friends joined in the conversation, and then several more after I mentioned my wiggly spirit on Facebook.

Before I knew it, I was feeling much better. For me, this was social media at its best.

Sometimes, the best thing you can do is bounce your thoughts, your ideas, your feelings, off other people. It makes you see that you are not alone, and can also shed a whole new light on the issue. A light that only finds a way to shine through discourse with others, because you just couldn’t find the switch in the dark, on your own.

I’ve never been very good at asking other people for help. It is one of my flaws. But on this night, these friends, people that I have never actually met “in real life,” understood that this was what I was doing and reached out their virtual hands. And I was grateful.

When I was looking for an image to go with this post, I came across this shot that I had taken of a reflection on my kitchen table. I’m pretty sure it’s a picture of my wiggly spirit.

And see that star? That is you all,

shining down on me.

I thank you.

spinning
twirling
whirling

a life
i can make
no sense
of

should it be
this
difficult?

struggles
setbacks
in
decision

i want to be
a flower

my only
job
to grow.

.

.

this post is part of one shot wednesday, for more poetry, click here.

Seeds have been started, weeds have been pulled,
dead leaves have been gathered and raked.
Tiny patches of green are popping up all over,
daffodils, tulips, bleeding hearts, crocus.

Spring has finally put on her green party dress,
with no apologies for coming so late to the party.

I will forgive her, though,
and take care of all the preparations,
so that all she has to do is relax
and enjoy herself.

I can’t help it,
I’m just so happy
to see her.

Hindsight is 20/20. or at least that’s what they say. I am blind as a bat, no matter what direction I’m looking in.

I keep trying to focus on what’s right in front of me, and sometimes, I can actually do it.

Other times, no matter how hard I squint, everything stays just a little fuzzy around the edges.

The older I get, the faster life passes me by. Or the faster I pass it, I’m not sure which. It’s like the blur on the edges of a highway. I know something is there, but I can’t quite make out exactly what it is.

When I slow down to get a closer look, all I see is trash and weeds and dirty ditches.

But wait.

If I look just a little harder, take my time and notice the details,

I see a small blossom nestled in amongst the detritus.

And that’s what I’m looking for.

Always.