every day i write words on a page. type them on a keyboard.
string them together like beads.
i have a lot of jewelry.
so are all these words just adornment? if i pull out a paragraph
and wear it for the day, does it make me look better? does it change my appearance? does it enhance my life?
does it make me into something other than the person i am when
i roll out of bed in the morning, looking much the worse for wear?
i feel different when i write, i feel like the real me, but that sounds so silly because, of course, i am always the real me, i can’t be anything different.
but all of the censors that are in place when i am face to face with people disappear when i write.
all of the doubts, the insecurities, the nerves.
gone, when i write.
it feels more like my natural language than speaking does.
it feels like the voice of my soul.
i can only hear that voice when i write.
is that weird?